Sucker Punch

I am such a misery guts lately. I have nooooo idea why. Like all I'm doing is working and going out with friends. Don't get me wrong, I adore my friends, and I could be in a lot more of a pickle than I am. I have no money issues of sorts, I have a job to find my alcoholic tendencies, and I have amazing friends. But I'm missing something. I don't know what it is. I think I've gotten myself into my Motel state again. Matt follows me around like a freakin puppy but even when I go and kiss other guys in front of him he still comes after me. I don't know why. Silly boy. I just don't like the poor chap. Wish I did, but I can do better, and after the last few I am certainly going to make sure I get what I deserve. I know my worth!

Currently watching Sucker Punch. The soundtrack is beyond epic, and although the film is slightly bleak and dark, all the girls in it are sexy as hell and can kick ass.

Oh oh oh. Word of advice, don't bother paying to see Prometheus in the cinema. Shocking shocking film. Like a whole other level of bad.

Need to get out of this funk.

Living In Wonderland xo

I like my bubble. I don't like leaving it. It's warm and cosy and safe and nothing can hurt me. When I do leave it, shit hits the fan and my reality kicks in and it bums me out majorly. Can't I just stay in here with you forever?

Living In Wonderland xo

Going To Live My Life To Destroy Your World.

I've been an emotional mess this whole summer. This was meant to be a great summer full of fun, drink, parties, 21st birthdays and no worries, but it hasn't. Well it has technically, but not always in a good way. I've had fights with people I thought I'd never fight with, opened my eyes to the truth about a lot of people finally, put myself through misery and a slow and painful heartbreak, fucked up my life in little but damaging ways, and now I'm literally at a life crossroad and if I go one way or the other either way I'm going to be pretty miserable. I don't like when people ask me what do I want to do, because I don't know what I want to do tonight let alone what I want to do with my life. The only thing I am honestly passionate about is fashion and make up, but the second I turn around and say to my family or friends that that's what I want to do they give me this "look", you know the one, the kind of look that says "yeah yeah sure you might want to pick something worthwhile instead that'll give you more money", but I've never been motivated by money. All I've ever wanted to be is happy in life and do things that I find interesting but the second I try to do it I get berated and scorned for it. So now I'm just begging people to tell me what to do, because I honestly haven't a fucking clue what to do. If anyone knows what I should do with my life please let me know. I'd love to go oer to London and start fresh or something and be a new person because no one over there will know the difference.

Let the good times roll on pleeeeeeeeeease.

Rant over, my apologies

Living In Wonderland xo

BALLS. I HAS THEM.

Haven't been able to post at all because my life has been all over the place in the past 2 months. I fucking hate people. Not just people. People who are meant to be my friends. Mainly girls actually, I don't know how girls can turn lesbian because I sure as hell wouldn't be able to take the double standards, bitchiness, back stabbing and hypocrisy the entire time. There are, I'd say, a handful of girls who I could honestly not want to kill right now. These people are meant to be my friends but yet they turn around and send me messages that absolutely shatter me and destroy my heart and then they don't have the balls to say a fucking word to my face, but yet have no qualms about saying things to my brother about me on a night out. My own brother! Christ almighty I need a vacation. I need my mother. Quite possibly the only woman in the world who hates women as much as I do right now.


GOD I WISH I WAS A BOY. At least if this shit happened to a guy you could just deck him square in the nose, call him a faggot then shake hands and make up eventually. You call a girl up on something she's done wrong and you are bitch of the century and nobody likes you for telling the truth.

I need a stiff drink and a smoke.

Sincerely hope your life isn't as shit stormy as mine is at the moment!

Living In Wonderland xo

SANO IS HOME

Christmas '09, before I chopped my hair off (the state of the ends of my hair ihhhhh).

I am so happy I could cry. She's jet-lagged to fuck so I'm waiting until tomorrow to see her with my brothers and Chris. Then it's dinner and alcohol time. I actually am welling up here whoooooooooooo!

I love my Sano.

Let Me See You Stripped Down To The Bone

Have you ever been so uninspired by things in life that you just float? I have really really been feeling that recently. Kind of like how fashion is at the moment. There's a lot of repetitiveness going on during some of the fashion shows this year. People seriously need to shake it up a bit. Alexander McQueen knew what I was talking about. But it seems like some of the people who are at the forfront of fashion ie. Karl Lagerfeld, have just been reproducing the same sort of monochromatic crap for the past decade. Don't get me wrong, I love Chanel like any other person, but ever since I can remember it has just been a bit of the quilted, black and white looks that have been floating around Chanel. Come on Karl, we know you're better than this, stop living for the name that is Chanel and show us what you're truely doing representing the name that is the icon!

 But do you ever remember the days when you would dress for yourself, and no one else? I'm talking about when we were about the ages from 3-7, when fashion wasn't in our vocabulary, and if we saw something that we thought looked nice and wanted to wear it, then god damn straight we were going to wear it. I'll always remember wearing a L.A raiders t-shirt (which I still have because I can't bare to get rid of it), tucked into a floral skirt, white tights, and Docs. I had grass stains on my kness to add effect and my curly hair was down my back. Like I looked the absolute shizz. Think back to when you were a child and ressed like spiderman or whatever; do you dress for yourself anymore? Or do you look at all the fashion magazines and change your style accordingly? I'm in no way bashing people who take inspiration from magazines, sure we all do. But I'm just always worried that people tend to lose a sense of themselves when they grow up. We need to retain that bit of immature, selfish, childish behaviour that let us dress the way we wanted to and God help anyone that stopped us from doing so.

But don't just take my word for it, what are your thoughts?

I'm off to frollick in my back garden in my fairy wings ;)

Happy glorious Saturday friends

Living In Wonderland xo

The Times They Are A Changin'

Recently I've been so uninspired by life. Not in a I'm-a-sucidal-person kind of way, but just nothing has given me that oomph that you get first thing in the morning to get you up and going. I've just kind of been breezing through life the last few weeks, going to college, doing assignments, coming home, watching tv, eating, drinking (at weekends, not every day!), sleeping, then repeated day in, day out. Gets boring. Repetitive. I have a habbit of getting stuck in a rut. I get too comfortable with my current situation and I like to stay in my rabbit hole of life. So, to get myself out of my rabbit hole I decided recently to shake things up a bit. Nothing major, just things like hanging out with different people, taking new routes home from college, walking to places I wouldn't normally do. Trivial and crap, yes I agree with you, but when I decide to do something radical it generally has bad repercussions affecting the people I love most. But these little things are good for me, it stops me getting sick of seeing the same people day in day out, and I get to make new friends and go to new scenes and kiss new boys. Kind of exciting in a sad and superficial way.

Oh oh oh if you are knocking about Killiney some time you must go up Killiney hill. It's bloody huge, you can explore for hours, has deadly history behond it and when you reach the top of the hill after nearly suffering cardiac arrest, you can take great pleasure in the fact that you can see half of Dublin from the top, with breathtaking views and peace and serenity. It's my most favourite spot in the world and if I ever need to think or not think, I can be found pearched in a little knook in a rock overlooking the sea. Beautiful.

Oh oh oh OH oh... I recently copped onto the fact that I am a sleazy motel... Let me explain briefly. Motels are the kind of places that couples come across, have fun, frollicks and general hanky panky, leave, then never ever ever return to or think about again bar the thought that returns once in a long long while saying "ah that was a good night". I AM THAT MOTEL. Guys have fun, kissy kissy or whatever and flirts with me then say bye bye. And I'm not some type of freaking bunny boiler where I think if I kiss a guy I am going to bloody marry him or whatever, fuck it like I don't even want to have a boyfriend I have too much fun being single, but it's a nice feeling being wanted, eh? I'd like to feel that at some stage! Ugh I'm only moaning about this because I'm suffering from a Tesco Value vodka hangover. It feels like your brain is trying to push itself out from behind your eyes. Delish.

Anyways my little mumbling rant is over now. As you were.

Must get back to fashion blogging soon, just too fricken tired recently.

Happy Saturday

Living In Wonderland xo

Little Secrets

I love people watching. It's a little thing I like to do. Whether I'm in Starbucks looking out over the dart line in Blackrock at people running to catch the dart just pulling in or overlooking the lake from the library in college, it kind of consumes me. Sarah and myself are the queens of this glorious past time. We make up stories about said people and both give our insights into what the person could be doing with their lives.  I wonder where these people are from, how rich/poor they are, whether they know any of my friends, if they have a significant other or are utterly alone. I also like to see when people bump into friends/college mates, and watch their body language to see if they fancy each other of if they've already had sex with them. It's actually quite hilarious how easily you can spot these things. A simple knowledge of body laguage opens up an amazing amount of insight! But my absolutely most favourite thing when it comes to people watching is seeing someone smiling to themselves walking along. Not one of those smiles that doesn't stretch to the eyes, but one of those thoughtful, remembering a private joke or happy moment kind of smiles. They're the ones that make my day. I'd like to be a smile on someone's face at some stage. Maybe it's already happened, I'll never know. But one way or another I've had plenty of those moments. You know the ones. You're walking down the road, listening to your iPod, then BAM! you remember something that happened to a friend that made your guts spill out of your mouth laughing, or something nice that someone said to you one day, or even something extremely embarrassing that you said or did to someone you really like (the last one has happened to me maaaaaaaaaaannnnnny times). But it really is like the saying that it's the little things that are important in life. A person letting you go through a door first, someone in the bathroom of a club saying they like your shoes, a smile from a baby in a pram, an old man lifting his hat to you as you walk past him in the street, or even your older brother leaving the last biscuit in the packet for you because he knows you're drooling over it in your head. Those are the things that make my day. Just think about it, if we did one nice thing for a random person or even your friend, then you might be that smile on that person's face the next day.

Just some food for thought.

Happy Wednesday everyone,
Living In Wonderland xo